Banana's

That about sums it up. I feel like I'm going banana's! This post is going to be kinda personal so please bare with me if I go into my rambling mode. So, I suffer from bi-polar depression and I also have anxiety issues. Fun fun! Over the past month or so things have started to get progressively worse. My doctor keeps messing with meds to try and find something that will work for me, so far no dice. So, my moods been on the foul side lately. I just don't want to be bothered.....with anything. I have absolutely no energy everything and everyone feels like they're riding on my last words. And the cherry on the top is I have people telling me it's all in my head. Yup, sure is. All in my head because I don't get to sleep until almost 5 in the morning and then I don't wake up until like 2 or 3 in the afternoon and I really don't even wanna get up then. I don't feel like doing a thing, my school work hasn't suffered so far. Thank goodness for that, that's the one thing I have to keep my mind busy with so I don't sit here and pick out every thought in my brain and drive myself crazy with it. It gets so tiresome having to deal with this day after day. And I've been having weird dreams. I lost my mom in 2007 to cancer, I took care of her non stop for 2 years and here lately I've been dreaming of her. It's never when she wasn't sick, it's always when she was. I don't know why that is. But everytime I dream of here I wake up with this like eerie haunted feeling. It's scary.
Too bad I don't have any lighter and brighter news. The only good thing that has happened this week is that it hasn't snowed. Although, it's supposed to snow tonight and tomorrow, I think I jinxed myself. I'll be so glad when summer gets here. I'm ready to put the top down on the car and go cruising. I think that's one of my favorite things in the world, driving down the highway on a hot summer's day, top down and radio blasting, and just drive. Oh and I saw the greatest thing in the world today. Robert Pattinson, who plays Edward in the Twilight movies, has a new movie coming out. It's called "Remember Me." Omigoodness, it looks so good. And he looks just heavenly in it. I think it comes out like the second week of March, but I can hardly wait. And the new Alice in Wonderland comes out on March 5th. I can't wait for that one either, Johnny Depp is going to be awesome as the Mad Hatter. I love Johnny Depp he's the only actor who could make a complete and utter villain lovable. The first time I saw Public Enemies, I was like "swooon." No one could have played John Dillinger better, no one! I think about how cool it must have been to live in a time period like the 20's and what it must have been like for his love, Billie to be wrapped up in that kind of lifestyle. It was so glamorous. Well, it may not have been but the movie made it look that way, lol. Anyhoo, I'm off to walk the dog. Stay tuned for the next episode.............